I still haven't made an about me after about a year on here so I guess here it is:
I have studied biomedical science at uni. I have many hobbies, including art, gardening, sewing, learning languages and more.
I am trans (unspecified, prefer to keep my gender private) and also bi. My sexuality is more complicated than that but it still fits.
I am a white mixed immigrant. I can't speak for POC because I am treated as a white person now, but if you're white and think this means you're "safe" to say gross shit around me, please fuck off.
I am undiagnosed autistic. The above listed hobbies were actually special interests.
Feel free to interact if you're not being mean :)
Personal, suicide mention, negative but everything is ok
I was so stressed yesterday because my girlfriend was suicidal from a sudden mood drop. I am still so tired today and had a headache for half a day as well.
She's in another state atm so I won't be able to see her for another three weeks. I just miss her a lot and want to hug her. The fact that she had a plan scared me a lot.
She has calmed down and is fine for now. I'm still worried.
Discrimination by "leftists" against minorities
I think a big problem in leftist spaces like this is people using their identity as a shield to defend themselves when called out about bigotry.
Being trans or gay doesn't mean you can't be racist. It is still necessary to question your beliefs.
Even identifying as part of the marginalised group doesn't mean you can't be bigoted unintentionally. Being a woman doesn't mean you can't be sexist, for example.
An identity alone doesn't mean you're gonna know everything. It's always good to listen and grow. No one has to be perfect, but problems arise when people stop questioning their ideas and stop listening to other marginalised people.
Sexism, sexual assault
I feel like a lot of cishet white men see sexism as just a slight difference of statistics between the groups. Just being a little more likely to not get the job, a little more likely to earn less, etc.
It is so much more than that. It is the casual conversations with your female friends about their boyfriends sexually assaulting them. It is the constant messages that you are literally less human or a different species to cis men. It is the constant stream of "you are biologically inferior", and the dismissal of your concerns and emotions if you dare to complain about it. Often, these types of messages are pushed on you from birth. They're so ingrained in our society that no one even notices, even though they're so glaringly obvious.
This type of shit is traumatic. It isn't just about earning a few cents less per dollar on average.
Trans issues and trans men, sexism
Trans men aren't inherently bad for identifying as men.
Being a trans man doesn't mean that you're automatically perpetuating the patriarchy.
In fact, many trans men have a deeper understanding of the harm the patriarchy causes than cis men because many had to experience it themselves at some point of their lives.
Issues often seen as "women's issues" often do affect trans men. Trans men get opressed by laws against reproductive rights and the lack of medical research on this type of body.
I've seen some hostility towards trans men and I don't think it is ok. Trans men have the right to speak up about issues that affect them without being silenced with "but you're a man, you can't speak about sexism".
Being harmed by the patriarchy isn't only for women, and if you experienced sexism that doesn't make you a woman.
Does anyone know if these types of butterfly decoy things are actually effective at scaring away butterflies that lay eggs on cabbages and stuff? I haven't been able to find any scientific articles or anything, just people selling them saying they work. It would be easy to make some but I don't want to waste time if they most likely don't work. I thought butterflies would be able to tell the difference between plastic and another butterfly but idk.
If you garden, what's your favourite plant to grow?
I think the most easy plant for me is tomatoes. They grow year round for me here. I have had a few problems but I haven't really had many plants dying without producing a single tomato. I love the variety in the shapes and colours of tomatoes also and it's so easy to collect seeds from them.
Abuse, kinda negative?
Often stuff I find talks about the intention being to control and hurt someone. I never want to do that to my girlfriend. But if I'm hurting her, do my intentions matter?
I just wish that there was a way to figure out for certain whether I'm making my girlfriend happy or not.
She says I'm making her happy and that she likes the relationship.
I thought I wanted to be with my ex too until we broke up and I instantly felt better to be without him.
I just wish I could know for sure.
Abuse, kinda negative?
I sometimes worry whether I'm abusive or not. I'm just worried that I'm unintentionally doing something that's hurting my girlfriend.
My girlfriend is having a bad time atm regarding self esteem and general mood and I sometimes worry that maybe I contributed to that somehow.
I tried to google how to know if I'm abusive or not but it's so hard to find answers.
I know asking pronouns is a popular option, but unfortunately that would still lead me to being misgendered because I'm not out. Everyone I know would rather be called "they" than be misgendered. If someone is out someone using "they" for everyone should hopefully demonstrate that they're a safe person to tell your real pronouns to!
Personally I much prefer using "they" by default over any other options that I've seen so it would be nice if more people did it
Reasons why I like it:
* Asking pronouns can be uncomfortable, especially when you're not out and you're asked
* "They" lets the other person know that not misgendering them is important to you, so they'll feel safer telling you their actual pronouns if they prefer something else
* I actually feel better about how I look now. Calling people "he" or "she" based on how they look made me feel bad about how I appear. It solidifies in my head that there's no way I have to look or a way I have to dress to be "valid"
I have many interests (art, science, growing food), I really enjoy making things.
People should work together instead of competing and hoarding wealth.
Sunbeam City is a Libertarian Socialist solarpunk instance. It is ran democratically by a cooperative of like-minded individuals.