getting a job at microsoft based solely on my ability to answer questions like "how would you move a mountain with only a teaspoon and a balloon?"

showing up to my first day of work wearing my hard hat and reflective vest and getting mad as hell when they tell me to program a computer

Ever have a thought in your head and google it to see if anyone else has thought it? Anyways, there were zero results returned for "balls deep in ice cream"

getting my feet amputated so i can always be safe for work

misinfo 

"pirated media" means that it's not suitable for beings under π years of age.

today i am reading about various uninhabited crags of rock in the middle of the ocean that have funny names. my favorite so far is Balls Pyramid, a big rock with nothing on it except for one tea tree bush and a bunch of giant bugs called tree lobsters who apparently live nowhere else in the world except under this one bush

executive dysfunction is a serious problem.
no company executive has ever helped society function well

It's a cupboard full of thinking rocks and blinking lights

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tiny floofy kittens with smal pawbs and pointy ears reblog if u agree

imagine walking on stage with your band. and the crowd is cheering. and you walk up to the mic. and you're like. 'hewwo'

"D&D is all about power fantasies" I whisper as I write 'perfect juggler' under proficiencies

thinking about logging on and being unhinged online, anyone tried this before

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Sunbeam City 🌻

Sunbeam City is a anticapitalist, antifascist solarpunk instance that is run collectively.