The purpose of putting pronouns in your bio is that most trans people must do this to avoid misgendering, and if only trans people have their pronouns on display it makes it really easy to single us out whether we want to be open about it or not, which leads to harassment.
If you're cis, put your pronouns in your bio. It helps trans people stay safe online.
Not "cis man/woman" or "male/female" or "mr/ms/mrs". The pronouns. Type out the pronouns. Whatever else you add is fine, but please just take 3 seconds, type the pronouns, hit save.
If you don't, trans people have no way of knowing whether you're a safe cis person or not, and I will generally assume you are not since you haven't put forth the minimal possible effort to help protect us.
@lanodan That depends on ur perspective.
Is the phrase alive or not? What is the English language?
pronouns Show more
@lanodan If u wipe out all the speakers of the phrase, it dies. If there is no more discourse over gender, theres no further need to reflect on it in a public space, even though it is very much a realworld space discrimination issue.
AFK isnt an entirely different world, its the world where the English language & the concept of gender lives. If you dont know how to use pronouns in the living English language, it doesnt matter what the card says on my online profile.
If u cant ask online, u cant ask in person, because u dont speak the phrase, & I dont care about the whole profile activism, even though its nice to have representation.
No one asks me my prefered pronouns or calls me Per or Mx instead of assuming my gender & generally saying it should be different. Because no one speaks that language - no one speaks it online or offline, & no one repeats that language cause they dont hear it. Its not in circulation.
Im talking about living through a living language & society.
@djenderesensjuelist I don't remember agreeing to debate you, complete stranger. I just don't know what we're even talking about anymore. You're bringing up complex linguistics in really vague ways and you completely lost me on what you mean by any of it. So excuse me if all I could think to say upon receiving this unsolicited response was "what?"
@r9 There's also at least one instance that assumes everyone that does not specify pronouns in their bio as "they/them/their"
@r9 Thank you for the explanation, I didn't think about that before! 🙇
The main way it helps is to normalise having pronouns visible. If everyone does it, it makes it hard to single out someone for being trans (hide in the noise)
But it also helps people feel comfortable and confident that they are welcome and valued for who they are, and that it's OK and safe to put their own pronouns in, and as the original message says, can help identify "safe" people to interact with.
@r9 thank you for this clarification for ignorant people like me 💜
@r9 I've been trying to do this since I got on Mastadon but I can't figure out how to get to those settings on my profile. Is it the profile metadata?
@r9 Interesting take. Thanks.
@r9 I was always cis and starting about five minutes after arriving on the internet I was already annoyed when people would just assume I was a cis guy. So yeah, please have some pronouns, with my blessing.
@r9 Just added pronouns because I was persuaded by your post 🙂
@r9 I did this on Tumblr but forgot to do it here. Thanks for the reminder!
@r9 Out of curiosity, why is putting mr/ms/mrs not as valuable as the actual pronouns? To me it seems like it conveys the same idea
@noahebenson See paragraph 1. People will take any wiggle room they can fathom to misgender us, so we are forced to be as explicit about pronouns as humanly possible to remove that wiggle room. So if you don't put the actual pronouns, it does nothing to help trans people avoid being singled out which is the whole point.
@r9 @noahebenson Jeremy, I hope this question isn't offensive, but why embrace gender pronouns at all? It seems to me they are a mechanism of oppression and it may be more appropriate to deny their authority by refusing to use them at all. Sorry to place the burden of explaining on you, and happy to read whatever you would direct me to.
@BrandonT Dude I'm just tryna get through my day without cis people trying to harass me or dox me or w/e. I ain't out to reinvent the entire english language from the ground up. I'm not an activist or an academic. I'm just a guy whose tired of bad treatment.
@r9 @dirk there are many reasons why people do not put their pronouns in their bio - it's not just lazy unaware cis people. For some people it's not safe, for some it's not just one pronoun but it varies too often to change, some people are on a journey and just don't know their correct pronouns. Please don't assume that every person you think is cis can easily put their pronoun in their bio.
@r9 @dirk Most people assume I'm cis - I'm not - I'm not trans* either. It's way more complex. I use my pronous as empowerment but not everybody can do this. Even if I can understand the wish for a safer place for trans* people a lot: In my opinion your request just creates the next binary: so, it's cis-trans* this time.
@maj @r9 I see, thanks for educating!
Of course there's a huge spectrum, but I read this toot as a plea to the (presumable significant) group of privileged people who feel definitely cis and would not mind stating their pronoun, yet are not aware of the benefit this may have for fellow mastodonians.
@maj @r9 Just like I haven’t been aware for quite some time that if I put up with the minor inconveniences of looking up my dinner recipes and comic blogs through #TorBrowser (the pages needing to load a second longer than usual), my privileged everyday nonsense helps camouflaging those vulnerable and at risk folks dependent on using Tor (like e.g. democratic dissidents in repressive regimes).
@maj @dirk I never agreed to a debate with you. I'm just some fucko who made a post and didn't realize it was tdov so it blew up and now everyone and their grandma wants to suck me into debates without asking for consent like I'm a big name activist rather than some random guy whose tired of receiving harassment from cis people. If you don't think the post applies to you, maybe it doesn't, idk. I ain't holding a gun to your head. If you disagree, you can disagree without trying to pull me and some other person i've never met into a lengthy match of words over semantics. Please leave me alone.
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